Thought Processes of a Cat

When to Sit on the Human’s Lap

Certain questions must be answered in the affirmative.

  • Is the human busy?
  • Is the human using their hands?
  • Does it look like they might need to get up soon?
  • How much of a chance is there that I might get caught being loving and friendly?

How to Tell When it’s Time to Leave the Lap

  • Does the human seem comfortable?
  • Is someone coming?
  • Did the human try to move AT ALL to make me more comfortable?
  • Is there any chance that there could be an injury if I put my claws out and pushed off RIGHT NOW?

Things I Have Considered Hobbies (Earliest Memories)

When we were little kids, my cousins– mostly ‘Kaya and I– made up a lot of ways to spend time.  My oldest female cousin and big-sister-surrogate, ‘Kaya, had spina bifida and so we did a lot of things that involved at least one of us mostly sitting.  We did a lot of making things up and talking, and I sometimes think it served to skew some of my conversational concerns.  It doesn’t take long for me to get all “Why aren’t we talking!?” because I didn’t do a lot of those “We’re working so hard, talking is impossible” things.

One of the oldest ones I remember was digging holes.  We were small people, with inadequate tools.  there wasn’t a lot of danger in our pursuits, except perhaps to the spoons we sometimes made off with to use as mini-spades.  We would spend what seemed to be hours trying to make a respectable hole.  None of us ever, even working together, made something one of us could stand in, but that was the dream.  Well, that was the dream at first.  Later we had to jazz it up a bit.

I don’t remember who the first one was to have heard of digging all the way to China.  Perhaps we had learned of the roundness of the world and asked what was opposite of us.  Perhaps someone asked if we were digging to China, and of course we said “yes” because once it was out there it was the coolest thing ever.  Once that was out there, we would dig, and make plans, and start thinking about the most efficient way.  Clearly we weren’t making very good progress, so we had to dig a deep, narrow, hole.  This hole would need to be easy to slide into, so we had our first thoughts of ergonomics:  We would contour our holes so that we could slide right in, with arm and leg “slots.”

Eventually, we were so overwhelmed with the possibilities of hole-related transportation, we imagined that we’d divert our paths to somewhere closer:  Disneyland.  Rather, we would say we were going to visit Mickey and Minnie Mouse. In my mind, that was Disneyland.  Perhaps in the others minds it was some underground place where they lived.  I don’t believe our discussions ever generated enough cognitive dissonance that we got specific.  Other cartoon characters followed, but for one reason or another, Mickey and Minnie stick out.

Santa’s name was bandied about, I know this much.

Another, more disturbing when I think now, destination was “The devil and the people.”  The phrase is exact and just seemed to roll off of our tongues.  I don’t know what the others were picturing, but somehow in my head it was quite a lot like Wolfman Jack and a bunch of generic people.  I don’t know now if we were going to rescue said “people.”  I don’t remember ever discussing the inherent evil and danger in going to see the devil and his “people.”  I’m, again, not sure where the concept came from, but it’s obvious how the connection worked.  We were digging.  Hell is traditionally subterranean.  It fits by that logic.

Once, in our diggings, we hit upon some kind of abandoned mini-warren of some sort and felt elated at all this extra “hole making” that was already done.  It didn’t amount to much, and as usual the holes would mysteriously disappear before we got too far.  I guess our folks wanted to save us from Mickey, the devil, and those chinamen.

It was really all a stopgap between trying to make trucks use their airhorns…

Relaxing in My Leisure Time

Doing nothing means something to everyone.  I remember watching Office Space and realizing that the main character actually meant just sitting there when he said it.  For me it’s always been a lot of things, and there’s always been a part of me that wanted to be sort of democratic about it, not spending too much time doing one nothing over another, because I knew in my heart I enjoyed them all.  I actually often roll a die (anyone who knows me will not be surprised) to determine what my primary multi-slacking of the moment would be.  When it’s one of the “more productive” results, I’m a little pleased. That is to say, like many people I don’t want to “waste” my “spare” time by not “doing something with it.”  Even as I type that I can’t see a single thing wrong with that.  I have to at least be able to kid myself that something’s going on.

So, I’m not the one to tell anyone why people, in general, have a hard time with leisure.  I think if something relaxes you, or makes you happy, then bingo(!) you’ve got yourself leisure.  If it happens to be something that could count in some way as “work,”  you win life and all it’s accoutrement.  As I said, I have a paranoid worry that I’ll do too much X and not enough Y in my spare time.  Variables  work in that sentence, because it doesn’t even matter what X or Y are.  There’s a misguided sense of “fairness” there, perhaps, as well as some kind of recognition that, while enjoyable, reading might just not be as “good” for leisure time as crafting, or more writing, for example.

The idea of “win” is something that I’m casually  obsessed with.  It’s not victory over someone else, there’s no human adversary  involved, at all.  “Win” is being great, “awesome,” triumphant over sucking  or “loss” in some way.  So, it seems to me, it’s perfectly logical that the pursuit of “win” can coincide with the leisure … although maybe not.  Pursuing is kind of stressful by its nature, so you can’t really be relaxed, can you?

I’ve got my mind set up so that taking a day off from housework barely is even possible.  I get up, so why not make my bed?  Of course, the cats need food.  They tell me that in no uncertain terms, so while I’m doing that, and filling the water bowls, isn’t that a good time to empty the dishwasher and, of course, wipe down the counter.  It’s right there, isn’t it?  Before I know it hours have passed and a number of the chores are done.  I suppose that’s not a bad thing, necessarily.  It’s great and bad to have such an embedded routine.  Great because things are getting done, even if many of them are sort of treadmill-like, and bad because it’s kind of hard to bust out and do something too fresh.  It’s another way to put off some important things.  After all, if I don’t do these things, who will?  A little extra craft for Etsy or really digging into that story have to wait, right?

That’s not my point, though, although it’s a good one.

I don’t know if most of us would know actual “doing nothing” if it bit us on the rear end.

I don’t know if that’s a bad thing.  Yet.

Requisite Resolutions Post

So, I don’t really think much in general of arbitrary new year blah blah… which everyone kind of says even as we do talk about goals and the like.  I don’t like talking about goals and the like, period, but just to feel honest with myself and accountable, I will take this “season” to be honest (not brutally so, but still), and say a few of the things I want to work on this year.

List form, of course! No particular order.

  • I want to fear people less
  • I want to continue working on really writing, and maybe selling, fiction.  Follow through is key.
  • Continue reading a book of some sort a week
  • Continue learning, hopefully I’d like to pick up a language this year (people, not computer)
  • Get back on a physical fitness kick, I’d like to feel more in control of my body
  • Get back on a spiritual fitness kick,  that’s all I’m saying
  • Find my calling and a real job
  • Keep trying to be the person I know I should be

In an un-bullet-worthy point:  I do also want to beat Rock Band on Drums this year.

Forgot The Other Two Hats

In all the Christmas rush, I forgot the other two hats I made for the holiday (now all safely on or near the heads of people).

The both came out really well, and I think I’m going to use the second one as the basis for a crocheted basket pattern one of my grandmas inspired.

In the end, the holidays were really great, and I enjoyed spending Christmas with my in-laws and New Years’ with my parents.  I got to see a few of my other relatives, too, and no one caught the flu this year– a massive improvement over last year.

Currently I’m working on a sweater from a book I found browsing through some bins.  It’s mostly a basic stockinette stitch raglan, but it’s my first project like it, if one doesn’t count my slightly mis-shappen first “big knitting” attempt of the little blue bolero/cardigan.  No pictures there as of yet, but I’m coming along, now that I’ve assembled the proper needles.  As another first, it’s the first time I’m working with bamboo knitting needles, and I suppose they are turning out to be quite strong, but I feel as though I could snap the little #5 needles at any moment.  Had I not been cornered by the totally inadequate selection around here and had to buy what I could find on Amazon when I was getting ready, I’d have stuck with the metal ones I usually use.

While I’m on the subject of needles, my parents bought me the Denise Interchangeable Knitting Needle Set for Christmas, and I could not be more jazzed about that.  I look forward to using it to finish my current project and on my next one, and, oh, just a bunch of things.

Knit hat
Knitted Rounds Hat
Crochet Bobble Hat
Last hat, crocheted with bobbles